New Mexico desert

Inside I’ll sing

So this song was what it took to get me back to writing in this blog. This song and the current situation, that is.

In this ongoing coronavirus crisis, so many people have lost so much, enterprises had to go out of business, cultural events were canceled, bars and restaurants are closed and many people lost their jobs, let alone the social distancing measures that forced many of those who are alone a lot anyway into isolation – with an end being nowhere in sight.

I am one of these people – being a freelancer myself I haven’t been able to work for weeks now. And since I belong to the high-risk group, I have to be particularly cautious. No one is able to tell me when – or if at all this year – I will be able to go back to work. And back to my usual lifestyle.
As no one is able to tell us when we can all go back to a “new normal”.

And with losing all that – my job, which is my business, connecting with close ones, traveling, concerts and festivals… came an emptiness that slowly creeped up inside of me. What am I if I’m not contributing to society by working and making money?
And how to handle this isolation, this total lack of closeness?
Without all those things that made me, well, ME, what is left of me? Who am I in this crisis?

But a bird’s still a bird without its wings

I was strangely touched by this particular verse in that song Spotify recommended to me just today. And maybe this is what many people need to hear in this crisis and this mandatory standstill.

Hearing the song I knew: You are still you. And that light still shines within you.

If I can’t take flight, then inside I’ll sing

I’ve been wondering if, maybe, this is a time to find a new outlet for that light. To find new ways to shine our light and to contribute.

And why not?
When everything is lost, everything is possible too.
So why not relax, at least a bit, and see what comes next? Open a few new doors. And on the days on which it seems that there just aren’t any new doors to open…stay patient.

And know that

While my hopes run dry, my strength remains*

*Quotes taken from the song "Inside I'll sing" by Shards & Isolation Choir.

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